ext_166161 ([identity profile] darklight90.livejournal.com) wrote in [personal profile] aconitedoll 2010-06-07 07:46 am (UTC)

I thought it was Minato that you were referring to in the opening paragraph until it became clearer that it was his perverted Sensei ;). Not so perverted here but a wonderfully-written piece of introspection. It's not too angsty which suits Jiraiya fine and there were brilliant unique phrases here: 'dead of the morning', 'free-falls out the window', etc. Just simple details but they make your writing stand out.

Again, a job well done. Keep writing!

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